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On Judgement Day, all the people were queuing up to enter heaven. God decided to divide the people into three lines. The first line was for the men who were dominated by their wives while living on earth. The second line was for the men who dominated their wives during their lives on earth. The third line was for all the women. God looked at the first two lines and saw that one was longer than the other.

The first queue was really long and God was greatly disappointed to see that there were so many men who failed to fulfil their destiny set by God as the head of the household. Their lives were completely controlled by their wives. But God saw that there was one man in the second line. Finally, there was one man who lived up to his calling. God turned to all the men in the first queue and told them to follow the good example of the one man in the second line. However, God was really curious as to how he did it. He turned to the man and asked him for his secret formula on how he managed to control his wife and not let her dominate his life. The man turned to God and said, “I don’t know, God. My wife told me to stand in this line so I obeyed.”

Marriage is long instituted by God. It was created by God in the Garden of Eden. When God instituted marriage, it was not meant for Christians alone but for all people. King Solomon told us in Ecclesiastes 9:9 (New Living Translation) to “live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life that God has given you under the sun. The wife, God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil”. Clearly, even King Solomon understood the meaning of marriage and to live happily with the woman that God has rewarded you for you your hardworks. King Solomon wants us to enjoy the marriage that God has instituted in our lives.

Marriage is important to God and to use. It represents how God loves us and our relationship with God. The Bible likens us as the brides of Christ. If we say that our marriage is not working, then we are saying that our relationship with God is not working. All His marriage institutions then are failure. This is not a good representation of God’s love for His people. There are many divorces in this world. We are Christians have a role to play and that is to show God’s love is real. We must ensure our marriage is successful as it is our message to the world that God’s love is real and our relationship with God is real.Ephesians 5:22-25; Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Saviour of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.The Role and Responsibilities of a Husband1. To be a leader

The husband is to be a prophet, priest and king to his wife. The husband is the leader and head of the household. As the leader and the head, men are called to have vision and to provide direction. Why is the man called to be the head? On the head, lie the eyes. The purpose of the eyes is to see far and near, to see ahead with vision. When God created the world, He created the man first and God gave man the responsibility of work to look after the garden and the animals. God left man with the accountability and command not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil before God created woman.

However, since sin entered the world through Adam, men began to fall away from God. Today, men are so busy working. They do not have time to pray. They do not have time to serve in the church. They do not have time to read the bible. They do not have time to provide spiritual food to their wives and children. How then is the man going to fulfil his role as the priest and king to his wife?

As the priest, the role is to lead the people of God into the presence of God. As the priest to your wife, your responsibility is to provide spiritual food and guidance to your wife, and to lead her into the spiritual presence of God.

A king always carries himself with dignity and authority. He is supposed to lead like the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit leads God’s people. He does not drive or push the people to meet God’s goals. The king rules the kingdom wisely and reigns among his people.2. To love his wife

A wise and loving king will put his kingdom and people first before himself. Similarly, as the husband, you are to lead your wife and family but not by force or by thumbing your wife down. A wise and loving husband will govern his household wisely and reigns. His family will respect him and obey him as he puts his wife and family first before himself. A husband must love his wife, be willing to give of yourself and lay down your life for your wife.

Every time we backslide or sin, we grieve God. But He never gives up on us. He saddles us with His love and lovingly holds us in His arms. God remains faithful even if we are unfaithful. In every way, the husband is to be like Jesus who loves the church and gave of Himself for our salvation. In the same way, the husband is to love his wife and give of himself to her.The Role and Responsibilities of a Wife1. To be a helper to her husbandGenesis 2:28; And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

God told Adam the reason why Eve was created. When God created the world, God said that everything He created was good. When He created man, He said that it was not good enough. God said that something was missing and it was not good for man to be alone. Although when God created Adam, he has a job to look after the Garden of Eden but God realised that it was not healthy for Adam to be alone. By being alone, Adam will not have a healthy character development. Hence, God created woman to be a helper and comparable in every way to Adam in order to assist him.

How then is the woman to help man to fulfil the visions and dreams given to him by the Holy Spirit? How is the wife to help her husband to see the visions and dreams from God? For the wife to be a helper, she must know the husband’s vision. It is the husband’s responsibility to share his visions and dreams with his wife. If your wife believes that the visions and dreams come from the Holy Spirit, she will believe in you. It is the wife’s role to help her husband to achieve his visions and dreams. As a wife, you are to be a dream enabler, not a dream stealer or destroyer. You are to encourage your husband and to render help to make the visions and dreams come true.2. To submit to her husbandEphesians 5:24; Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

The responsibility of a wife is to submit to her husband. When the Bible says that a wife is to be submissive to her husband, it does not mean that she becomes a slave, to be thumbed down, to be ordered around or to be abused. A wife is to be encouraging, supportive and helpful. In turn, she is to be loved, treasured and respected by her husband. As a wife, you are to submit to your husband in everything.

If a man is married to a woman, who is high powered, more educated than him, and earned much higher, he must do his duty as a husband and as head of the household before she is willing to submit to your authority. Think about it. If you first love your wife and shower her with your agape love, you will find your wife loving you willingly in return. Just as God first loves us, as husband, you are to love your wife first.

Why does marriage fail and Woman dominate over Man? Let’s see in the part 2.

“And it shall be that every living thing that moves, wherever the rivers go, will live. There will be a very great multitude of fish, because these waters go there; for they will be healed, and everything will live wherever the river goes….Along the bank of the river, on this side and that, will grow all kinds of trees used for food; their leaves will not wither, and their fruit will not fail. They will bear fruit every month, because their water flows from the sanctuary. Their fruit will be for food, and their leaves for medicine.” – Ezekiel 47:9, 12

It is very interesting but have you ever stand next to a river and take a look at the surrounding environment around the river bank? I never really did until one day when I drove across a bridge over a deep river on my way to my mother-in-law’s house. The children were swimming freely in the river. Further down, I saw some women washing their clothes in the river. Some men were enjoying an afternoon of fishing activity, undisturbed by the noises coming from the playful children. I noticed lots of trees, bushes, flowers and plantations along the river bank. These were green, healthy plants blooming with life. Along the river bank, there is life.

It was then, I heard this distinct voice said, “where the river flows, it brings life.” Yes, indeed, I began to understand what it means when I looked at the people and activities along the river bank. We have a river within us, too. Whether this river is alive and flowing or mashes of swamps in our lives. Ezekiel 47:1-12 describes this river within us that flows from the sanctuary of God. God was showing Ezekiel the meaning and the purpose of the river.

The Source of the River

Ezekiel 47:1 tells us that the source of the river comes from the sanctuary of God. In the Old Testament, the sanctuary is a physical temple of God. But God moves Himself from a physical temple into our heart. The Bible says that our body is the Temple of the Holy Spirit. He is here to stay in us when we accepted Jesus as our personal Lord and Saviour. The Holy Spirit is a seal of our identity as the child of God, redeemed by the blood of Christ. Now, in us, flows this river and the source of the river is the Holy Spirit. But this river must flow out of us and whether it is gushing out of us, will depend on our spiritual walk with our Father. In order for the river to gush out of us, we must make room for the Holy Spirit to fill us and lead us in our walk everyday. We can stop the Holy Spirit or we can allow the Holy Spirit to take control of us.

The Course of the River

Ezekiel was shown the river. He was also led by the angel out from the temple into the river. First, the water was up to his ankles. Then as he walked deeper into the river, the water came up to his knees. He walked further into the river, the water came up to his waist and eventually it was too deep for him to walk in the river. He has to swim. As the river flows, it does not get widen and widen. Instead, as it flows, it cuts deeper and deeper into the land. As we choose to walk with God, you will find that your life becomes stronger and deeply rooted in God and His words. It also means that you begin to trust God more and more because in the deep river, you cannot walk and touch the ground, you can only swim. When there are no more steps to stand on, we need to let go of ourselves and learn to rely on God to guide you across the river. Depth and substance are what God wants to build in us, not width and more material wealth. These are just the by-products of seeking God first. If we are not anchored in God, we will find ourselves struggling to keep alive by swimming but eventually our strength will wear out and we will drown from fatigue.

The Mashes and Swamps that Stop the River Flows

As the river flows, there will be obstacles and hindrances that prevent the river from flowing on. When the river stops to flow, it forms into lake, swamps and mashes. These dead sea is no good to anyone as the water is too salty for any use. It cannot be used for drinking. It cannot be used for providing nutrients to the growth of plants and food. It is basically useless. In our lives, we must beware of swamps and mashes that hinder our personal relationship with God. These swamps and mashes prevent the power of the Holy Spirit flowing through us to others. When these swamps and mashes are built up over time, nothing living can grow in it. When we walk away from God and refuse the working of the Holy Spirit in our lives, we are like the swamps and mashes. No life will flow from us and everything we touch does not bring life and draw others to God.

There is power in the flow of the river. The force of the river brings life. The amount of flow will depend on how much we are willing to allow the Holy Spirit to work in our lives.

There must also be life in us. If the force of a flowing river is powerful, all kinds of plants will grow alongside it and bear fruits. These fruits become food for us. The leaves become medicine for healing. When we walk with God, our lives will become fruitful as we do good works. Through our good works, it becomes food for our spiritual growth and for others to be helped and encouraged. We become “medicine” for others who needed a helping hand, a listening ear, and a shoulder to cry on. As we help the poor and needy, we bring healing to their souls through our kindness, love, compassion. They will see God and the goodness of God through you. But if you are a dead sea, there is no output from dead sea except lots of salt. And we know the more salt you take, the thirstier you become, and you will die from lack of water.

God has positioned us where we can become the channel for the river of life to flow through and out of us to bring life to others around us. Ask yourself whether your life is full of swamps, mashes or a dead sea. Or, is your life a flowing river or a still river? If you have not allowed the Holy Spirit to take control of your life today, will you go before God and ask Him to fill you with His Spirit to make you a living river? It is never too late to do so.

Heb 11:1 – Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

‘Substance’ here refers to the foundation that supports you in your life. Your faith is going to carry you through 2008. ‘Evidence’ means ‘confidence’. Faith is being confident of what you are going to achieve based on what you see right now. It is an attitude and a posture of confidence that God is leading you all the way.

Faith is having the confidence of holding yourself or your own when you are with powerful people, bosses, colleagues, subordinates and even family or strangers. God wants us to walk in confidence. Hebrew 10 tells us to hold on to our confidence and not to throw it away.

Without confidence, means without faith, and without faith it is impossible to please God. This confidence is not about arrogance but trusting God and knowing that He will see you through. God’s power travels through an atmosphere of faith. Faith comes by hearing the Word of God. When God’s words are preached, deliverance, healing and all signs of miracles is performed and confirmed through faith. The anointing power travels through our confidence in God. Have confidence that God is with you. With an attitude change, your ministry is changed by having confidence and walking in confidence.

Your confidence is the cable where God’s power travels like a live wire from heaven to you. When Jesus was attacked by the devil in the desert, he was tempted in the realm of His confidence. Satan was interested in Jesus’ life and His confidence. In Matthew 4:1-3, 5-6, 8-9 – especially verses 3, 6, 9 – notice the words ‘if you are the Son of God’ that Satan used. Satan was testing Jesus’ confidence as the Son of God. He was daring Jesus to prove that He was the Son of God by doing what Satan wanted Him to do. It was necessary for Jesus to show who He was. Satan uses the same techniques on us, too. The devil will tempt us that ‘if we are the children of God, then do this and that’. The devil will always test and shake our confidence again and again in our faith as the child of God.

The devil is a scholar of Bible School. He knows the scriptures very well but he twisted it. To defeat the devil, we have to know the bible too. Years ago, there was a newspaper article featuring two young men of a local church who was killed by a drunken driver on their way home from church. The pastor of the church started this church not too long before the accident. After the accident, a Christian friend of the pastor from his previous church came to mock at the pastor. This friend was telling the pastor that ‘if the divine blessing of God was upon you and your church, why was there no divine protection upon your congregation?” We know that this is not true. We live in a broken world. Satan attacks not only an individual, he will try to attack the whole church’s confidence as well. When we do God’s works, the devil will do everything he can to shake your confidence. The devil was trying to shake the pastor’s confidence in believing that the church he pastor was not under God’s will. But this church, today, stands strong and is still growing.

The devil is very cunning and will make you doubt who you are in God. But the beautiful thing is when Jesus was tempted, Jesus did not have to prove to the devil, his enemies or even his disciples that He is the Son of God. It is the ultimate confidence He has in who He is. He did not have to prove Himself. The same goes for us.

When we are impacting the realms of arts, media, entertainments, business, education, and so forth, the devil will try to break your confidence and ask you to prove yourself and to men. Even Christians will ask you to prove that God is with you especially in the midst of negative events. But when you worry, the more you will worry. When you focus on the negative, the negative will expand. When you give reason and react to fear, you loose your confidence.

In Matthew 11, Jesus wants us to be the light of the world. He mingled and make friends with the tax collector, the sinners, the prostitutes, and the fisherman. He shocked the conservatives of His times. Jesus sent His disciples into the world, to reach out to the world which is directly opposite from what the holy men of His times taught. They taught the people to get out of the world/darkness into the light. They told the “holy men” not to mix around with the sinners of the world because they were defiled. Jesus did just the opposite. His disciples went into the world, to go as sheep among the wolves.

Even John the Baptist doubted Jesus. John the holy prophet sent his disciple to ask Jesus whether He was truly the Son of God (Matt 11:5). But Jesus did not prove Himself to John or his disciple by performing miracles before them. Instead, He responded by telling John to look at the fruits of His life where the sick were healed, the blind saw, the lame walked. He said to John, “Blessed are those who were not stumbled because of Me”. Jesus was not bothered with what people thought of Him. He simply did what the Father wanted Him to do. This is the confidence He had of who He is.

The key to faith is Revelations. Faith comes by hearing the word of God. Confidence comes through revelation. Jesus was brought up like any other children of His times. He went to school, to the synagogue to study the word of God, He read the bible everyday, He worshipped God in the temple with His parents. Through His studies of the word of God, He learnt about His identity, who He was and what His mission was on earth. He never doubted His identity. He carried on with the works of the Father although He read of His death, His suffering and His resurrection. He knew He was the Chosen One and the Messiah. The revelation was clear to Jesus throughout His growing up years. John 13:3 clearly says Jesus knew where He came from, what have been given to Him and where He was going.

Do you know who you are as surely as Jesus does? It is important for you to know:

1. Your position – who you are in God. You are the head and not the tail.

2. Your power – the anointing and the spiritual gifts given to you.

3. Your purpose – God’s will for you in your life to impact the world for Him.

John 13:4-5 listed Jesus washing the feet of His disciples. Jesus, being the Creator of the universe, Lord of lords, King of kings, he actually knelt down to wash the feet of the disciples. In the olden days, the washing of the feet of the guests is a job done by the lowest level servant upon arrival and before meals. The disciples before the supper were arguing who would be the greatest in the Kingdom of God so none of them was humbling himself to wash the feet of their fellow brothers before the supper. Each was thinking he would be the greatest next to Jesus. Jesus set them an example that the greatest leader must be a servant leader. He knew His position as the Son of God, yet He stood and washed the feet of His disciples with confidence and love. He was not even focusing on the revelation that shortly one of them would betray Him and the rest would desert Him. He became a servant with love that night.

Some of us may feel that becoming a servant is belittling of your position. You may be a CEO of a big company, a high ranking officer in your department or a rich man living in huge houses and driving an expensive car, you are still called by God to be His servant to serve His people. Jesus was also called the Holy Servant because He was humble and did the work of a servant, serving the people of God. Similarly, as the servants of God, we are to serve. The more you serve God’s people, the more you contribute to helping them make their life better. God, seeing your humility, will raise you up before the eyes of men.

Another example is Joseph (Genesis 39-41). Joseph, was arrogant in his younger days. But as he became a servant in Egypt, he learned to be humble and walked with God. As the head servant in Potiphar’s household, all authority was placed into his hands, yet he did not abuse his authority and serve his master well. Later, he was thrown into the jail after being wrongly accused, he continued to serve the keeper of the prison. Eventually, the Lord brought him before the Pharoah and he became the right hand man of the Pharaoh. The bible said that God was with Joseph and all things put into Joseph’s hands, God prospered him. God raised him from nothing to the highest rank. All these were possible because of Joseph’s personal walk with God, his confidence in God and his humility to serve his masters despite of the full authority placed into his hands. Never once did Joseph abuse his authority given.Confidence give you power to serve.

How do you maintain your confidence in God? In Psalm 91:1, we are to run to God and dwell in the secret place of God. Psalm 23 is a beautiful Psalm that tells us God is our Shepherd. In verse 1 to 3, the Psalm begins with the writer referring to God being the third person as shown in the word used “He makes me”, “He leads me”, “He restores my soul”. From verse 4 to 6, it says that “when I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for You are with me.” The third person from verse 1 to 3 became personal when the writer used the word “You”. It showed that God has become part of his life and he has a personal relationship with God. Only when you are confident that God is with you, you are not afraid to brave any difficulties. It is even okay that not everyone is happy with you but you know that God is with you and all things will be well.

What did Jesus do when he was troubled? He always prayed. He would go to a secret place early in the morning, late at night in the mountain, where no one could reach Him and disturb Him. He went away to a quiet and secret place to pray to God. These were the moments when He was able to pour out his soul to His Father and have His strength be renewed and recharged.

Do you have a secret place where you can pray to God? To nurture your confidence in God again? If we dwell in the secret place of God and walk in confidence with God, we have no fear. Today, if you have no set aside time to pray about the troubles in your heart, it shows that it is really not important enough to warrant you going on your knees before God and cry out for help. Only when you do so, then will you be able to find the peace of God surrounding your heart, to hear a new revelation on what to do and to nurture your confidence in God again. Take the effort to go away to your secret place to be with God, you will not regret doing so.

7. Values of Faithfulness (Trustworthiness)“Faithfulness is the cornerstone of one’s character” – Edwin Louis ColeLuke 16:10, 12 – (NKJV) – He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is unjust also in much. And if you have not been faithful in what is another man’s, who will give you what is your own?1 Corinthians 4:2 – (NKJV) Moreover it is required in stewards that one be found faithful.

Faithful is our manna, especially to the things that belong to another man. If we are faithful in the little things, we will be faithful in much. Without faithfulness, there is nothing to build that will last. Be faithful in the things placed into your hands whether be it in submitting your works on time, not taking things from the office home for your personal use, be a good steward in your finances and, so forth.8. Values of Hard Work (Diligence)2 Peter 1:5 – (NKJV) – But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge.2 Thessalonians 3:10 – (NKJV) – For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat.Ephesians 4:28 – (NKJV) Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need.

The bible tells us to give all our diligence in the things we do. Paul says that if we do not work, we do not get to eat. For an organization to grow, the employees must be hard working and labour with their hands things that are good. In times to come, those who work hard and store up, will also be able to give to those who are in needs.9. Values of Integrity (Truthfulness)John 14:6 – (NKJV) Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.John 8:44 – (NKJV) You are of your father the devil, and the desires of your father you want to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it.Matthew 9:12-13 – (NKJV) When Jesus heard that, He said to them, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy and not sacrifice.’ For I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners, to repentance.”

The moment you lie, trust is broken. In this broken world, you know you can tell the truth and still be loved. Better be your way and greater be your life if you build your life on truth. John 8:44 tells us that Satan is a liar and there is no truth in him. He is different from Jesus. Jesus is the truth and there is no lie in Him. When you lie, you walk in lies. You made the devil your father, who is the father of lies. There is no glory, honour and praise in the lack of integrity. But Jesus said that He did not come for those who are well, righteous and rich – Matthew 9:12-13. He came for those who are sick and unloved. When we sin, when we lie, we can repent and return to God. He will welcome you gladly back into His arms. The church of God has rooms for people who are weak, for people who fail, for those that the world rejects. In our marriage, between husband and wife, it must be built on truth and love.10. Values of Generosity (Be a Giver/ Have a Generous Heart and Spirit)Acts 20:35 – (NKJV) I have shown you in every way, by laboring like this, that you must support the weak. And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’1 Timothy 6:6-8; (NKJV) – Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content.James 3:14-15; (NKJV) – But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.

One of the best ways to break envy is to be a giver. The more you give, the blessed you will be. When you are envious of people and covets after their possessions, it is demonic. It is self-centredness ruling and it is carnal, of the flesh. It does not come from God.

Where do these ten values come from? Please visit Sermon Alive and also look at the part 1, 2, 3, 5, and 6. Go to www.sermonalive.com